Roei Shalev, a survivor of the Nova Music Festival massacre on October 7th, committed suicide last Friday.
By Rachel Avraham
Last Friday, another survivor of the Nova Music Festival Massacre on October 7, 2023 committed suicide. Roei Shalev, whose girlfriend Mapal Adam was murdered in front of him, decided to burn himself to death in a car outside of Netanya, the Times of Israel reported. According to the report, Israel Police said it opened an investigation into the circumstances surrounding the 30-year-old’s death.
The last time Shalev was seen alive was when he purchased a gerry can of gas on Friday evening, the Ynet news site reported. “Everyone was stressed and worried that he would harm himself. We searched everywhere in the hope of finding him,” an unnamed friend told the news outlet.
Hours before his body was found, Shalev wrote a post on social media explaining that he “couldn’t take it anymore,” and asking for forgiveness. “Please don’t be angry with me, please. No one will ever understand me, and that’s okay because you can’t understand. I just want this suffering to end. I’m alive, but inside everything is dead,” he wrote.
The Nova Tribe Community Association mourned his loss, stating that Shalev was one of the pillars of the community, Haaretz reported. “We ask to remember him in his most beautiful moments,” they wrote. “Remember him for his brave support of the community, his leadership as the captain of the Nova Tribe basketball team, and his constant dedication to helping his friends in their most difficult times. In this moment of sorrow, we urge everyone to stay strong together, to truly see one another and pay close attention to those around us.”
In November of last year, Shalev shared his struggle as a survivor of the Nova massacre. “I feel like I’m soaring sky-high, and then, boom, I think of Mapal, and boom, I start crying. I just cry my eyes out,” he said in an interview to Yedioth Ahronoth.
In an interview one month before with Mako, he described how the trauma had infiltrated every part of his life. “This is who I am, a walking case of post-trauma. I went through something insane,” he said. “Sometimes it’s easy to control, and sometimes you have to drop everything, go outside and breathe. Even hearing someone speak in Arabic could be triggering.”
Shalev said he feels guilty for surviving the massacre. “I lost a lot. It hurts, and it will hurt for the rest of my life. I guess, and I hope, that with time it will fade,” he said. “At first, it was unbearable – the guilt, conscience, and anger – but I came to understand it was bigger than us. I wish I could have switched places with Mapal. She was better than I, she deserved to live more than I do. I wish it could have been her, not me, that survived,” he shared.
Arutz Sheva reported that Former Prime Minister Naftali Bennett shared a personal post at the end of Shabbat in which he revealed for the first time the moving and painful account of his meeting with Roi Shalev. He went to Adam family’s home shortly after the October 7th massacre, where he first heard from Roi the description of the events of that day. “Roi described in a trembling voice how they hid under a car, with dozens of terrorists around them, and how they were shot at point-blank range. He recounted how blood flowed from Mapal’s body, and her life flowed out of her and ended there”, Bennett wrote.
He continued, “I felt like I was hearing the story of a Holocaust survivor minutes after his liberation from Auschwitz. Because that is what it was there — a small Holocaust. There was no state. There was no army. Jews hid for hours from murderous monsters.” Bennett noted that Roi felt pangs of guilt for not having been able to save his partner, but the family stressed to him that he was not to blame. “Her family received him with love and sensitivity”, he wrote.
Bennett related that Roi had worked since then to help others, but took his own life early on Shabbat. “Another soul murdered on that cursed day”, Bennett added. According to Arutz Sheva, Bennett concluded his remarks with a call to remember all the victims of that day — the murdered, the wounded, and those with mental health challenges — and to care for them as a national priority.
According to Haaretz, Shalev is the second survivor of the Nova music festival massacre to take his own life. Haaretz noted that last October, Shirel Golan, a 22-year-old survivor of the massacre, also committed suicide.
Photo from CNN-News18: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXBtrWrrLdg
